party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
And then he peed in my hair
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