i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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