Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
