Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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