I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
