i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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