just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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