I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize