good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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