Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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