this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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