Betty ford says i'm here all night
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
