So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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