did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
