I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
