yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
