Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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