Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize