im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
She tied me up with her honor cords...
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
