I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
