if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
