who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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