The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
