Are we in a gay sports bar?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
My vagina just recognized that song.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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