Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
