Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize