if i died would you start the facebook group?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
