dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
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