Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
