You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I touched a dick in church today
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