Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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