god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
