he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
this hospital has no fireball
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
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