Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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