I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
