don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
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