at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
