Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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