we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
This toilet bowl is my home.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
