yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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