I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize