Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
she was so not down for the gang bang
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize