I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
