i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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