theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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