I think i peed on brittanys purse
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
How's work?
Spinning.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
