winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
