The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
