with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
