I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
