Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Randomize
